Happy New Year!

IMG_20160101_1223105072015 was a pretty darn good year, overall; my best so far. About half of my pregnancy sucked, sure, and giving birth wasn’t all that great, but in the end I got a gorgeous little girl out of it. It’s been an adjustment, taking care of this tiny human, trying (struggling sometimes) to decipher her cries, and rejoicing in all the Firsts and her beautiful laughs. The best kind of adjustment, in my opinion. The sleep adjustment isn’t as bad as I thought it would be, but that might just be because I got used to not sleeping well during pregnancy (and really, there’s a huge difference between not sleeping well because of heartburn and joint pain and RLS, and not sleeping well because your baby wants food and cuddles). I think my least favorite adjustment is being a working mama, but hey, gotta do what I gotta do. I can stay home with her once I win the lottery, right?

One adjustment I haven’t fully gotten used to yet is balancing my free time. I know I have so many things I should be doing (one of them being exercising) but I don’t like being away from my baby any longer than I have to. That’s actually the same reason I drastically cut back on working out when I started dating my husband. I’m still trying to get back into it 3 years later. On the bright side, I know I will go on walks with my baby once warmer weather comes around; I just don’t want to keep wasting my gym membership.

So I guess, now that it’s a new year, I should mention resolutions. My resolution last year was to deliver a healthy baby, and succeeded in that. I’ve even started eating healthy-ish so she isn’t getting so much junk in my breastmilk. Cut back drastically on coffee, and caffeine in general, and I’ve been trying to cut back on dairy as well. So my resolution for this year is to continue my healthy life changes. Not worried about the weight so much right now, as I know breastfeeding uses up my body fat so my body will hold onto some of the weight as backup, I just want to get back into a healthy routine. I’m actually already back to pre-pregnancy weight (have been since 6 weeks postpartum), but if I can tone up this year, I’ll consider that a win.

Some things I’m looking forward to this year:
– Valleyfair
– New home
– Auntie Ree coming to visit
– Ronyn learning to walk/talk/crawl/eat
– Quitting pumping

First Christmas

IMG_20151226_141121881Our first Christmas with baby Ronyn on the outside was pretty eventful, nothing too crazy. We drove up to visit my husband’s family, and found out that bedsharing in a ‘full’ instead of our normal ‘queen’ bed kinda sucked. At one point, I woke up on my husband’s side of the bed, and baby Ronyn had the entire other half. So that was interesting. Other than that, she had one major blowout, and a couple minor leaks; she got passed around and got to see lots of new faces, and did great with that until she got hungry. She was able to meet great-grandpa, and he got lots of smiles out of her. Really, I think the worst part of the trip was the drive home; she was too upset to take a pacifier, and even sucking on my thumb didn’t calm her down, so we had to stop much earlier than expected in order to feed her. Not sure if she was actually hungry (it had been less than an hour since she last ate), or if the lack of normalcy finally got to her, but thank goodness for the magic of breastfeeding! Instantly happy baby.

So originally, we were supposed to head home in the morning on Saturday, but with the weather reports showing lots of snow early in the morning, we decided to head home Friday night instead. Got home around midnight, and passed out almost right away. Then Saturday was celebrating with my side of the family (or rather, just my parents and brother). We met up for lunch at La Casita, and then headed to my parents’ house to hang out and open gifts. My brother’s girlfriend made a Mew hat for Ronyn, and a Toothless hat for Jade, they’re both *amazing*.

Overall, great Christmas, can’t wait to see what next year brings!

Socializing Baby

OH MY GOSH SMILES.

It really is the coolest thing ever to smile at your baby and for them to actually smile back. I still tear up sometimes when she does it. Not sure if it’s still the hormones, or if it really does just affect me like that so much. I also tear up when she starts babbling to me. Although part of that might also be because she gets all smiley at the same time. I just feel like a hormonal mess sometimes! Thankfully, not with mood swings, just getting all emotional about my daughter’s milestones.

Anyways. 11 weeks yesterday, which means I’ve been back at work for 5 weeks already. Pumping is going well, I’ve decided to just pump at my desk instead of finding a room to pump in. I’m able to work while pumping, as long as I only do one side at a time. My cubicle is fairly secluded, and the people around me don’t mind the noise of the pump (or they’re lying, but I made sure to ask them several times back when I first started). If I layer my shirts, there’s absolutely nothing to see, and I can use both hands to type. And work is going well, too; I don’t get as much sleep as I’d like, but I’m on time more often now that my husband isn’t working (he had to wake up at 5:30, and I would make our smoothies and then go back to bed… and not want to get back up). I wake up around 6:30 (or whenever baby girl decides that she’s hungry again), I feed and change her, and I get myself ready for work. Sometimes it takes longer to do everything I need to do, sometimes I had too much trouble sleeping to wake up to my alarms, and sometimes I just don’t want to set my baby down…

In other news, she’s been spitting up a lot lately, so I’m going to try cutting my morning coffee and lunch Mountain Dew.. Not excited, but I’m hoping it solves the problem. I survived the loss of caffeine today, we’ll see how the rest of the week goes. Wish me luck!

The First Six Weeks

11052017_10101559621358651_4907501295105358200_nSome cool things:

  • Cuddling with baby (I can’t think of anything that tops that)
  • No more heartburn!
  • Breastfeeding actually feels pretty cool once your nipples are broken in
  • I can wear my wedding ring again! And most of my clothes
  • I can drink alcohol again. Not that I actually do, but I have the option to (if I time it right with breastfeeding, or we have pumped milk ready to go)
  • Netflix for HOURS

Some not-so-cool things:

  • Breastfeeding sucks for a week or two, until your nipples get used to it
  • LEAKING. ALL. THE. TIME.
  • Healing from the episiotomy
  • Tough decisions, such as: put her down to shower, or keep cuddling? (almost always chose the latter, not gonna lie)
  • Changing her diaper. Immediately after changing her diaper.
  • Realizing that I should have taken that nap when I had the chance, cause now she’s dead set on crying all night and I’m too tired to keep my eyes open

I had a hard time breastfeeding at first. Not as hard as some people, for sure, but it was still hard for me. She had a perfect latch right away, so I never had to worry about that part, but I had a lot of pain the first two weeks. I ended up with milk blisters on both sides almost right away, and I had shooting pain on the left side anytime I tried to nurse on that side (but no other signs to indicate any issues). I had to stop nursing from the left side for a few days and exclusively pump from that side, and when I tried it again there was almost no pain whatsoever. Definitely glad I gave myself that break.

Week 39, Day 6: Birth

11924270_10101525216411441_4580394285271715966_nSo it turns out that was the bloody show. The next morning, I woke up and finally felt the difference between labor contractions and braxton hicks. The contractions weren’t too painful at that point, and still irregular, so I tried to go about my day as usual. By mid afternoon, it was uncomfortable enough that I decided to skip my boss’s birthday party, and just watched Netflix with my husband. By evening, the contractions were painful enough that I just wanted to go to the hospital and be done with it — but couldn’t justify it, since they were still very irregular. I tried laying on my side for a while, tried going to sleep, even tried taking a bath. Nothing helped the pain, though it does seem that something made the contractions more regular.

I decided around 10pm that contractions were regular and close enough together to go to the hospital, so we packed our things and called my doctor, and headed out. We checked in at 11, and I was at about 4cm dilated. Around midnight, I asked for IV pain meds, which turned out to not do much for the pain, but rather just helped me to relax despite the pain. Unfortunately, the second round of that didn’t do anything for me at all, but by then my water sac was bulging, and I was dilated to about an 8 or 9. I tried to deal with the pain, but ended up asking my doctor to break my water for me. That definitely helped, having the pressure relieved a bit.

Then it was time to push. I must have pushed for half an hour at least, though it didn’t feel like I was getting anywhere with it despite them saying they could see the head. I felt blocked, so when the doctor suggested an episiotomy, I decided to go for it. Just a few pushes after that, and my baby girl was finally on the outside.

Born at 3:48am, 9lbs 1oz, and 21 inches long. Straight, golden blonde hair (slight tint of red in the sunlight); dark blue eyes (for now); long fingers and long toes; and a large birthmark (mostly) under her hair. Everything looks perfect, except the birthmark might be cause for concern since it’s pigmented, so they want me to bring her to a dermatologist soon. But she’s my rainbow baby, and she’s perfect to me.

Week 39, Day 4: Bloody Show?

Just a quick update, so I have it on record in case it means anything.

Well, I had some brown mucus-y discharge today. Could be mucus plug, could be bloody show. Unfortunately, unless I know for sure that it’s bloody show, it doesn’t mean much except that it’s probably gonna happen in the next couple weeks. Which I already know, since my doc won’t let me get past 41 weeks (I might ask for a membrane sweep at 40 weeks though, not sure if she’ll do it but it might be worth a shot). However, I’m crossing my fingers that it means baby will come this weekend.

Week 39: Ugh. Just, ugh.

Baby Size: Small Pumpkin
Dilation: 3cm+
Effacement: 70%
Station: -1

How does she even still have room in there?? I’m at the point where it now takes quite a bit of effort just to roll to my back from one side — and still need to roll to the other side after that, because laying on my back isn’t comfortable. My left leg slides out of the joint (or at least threatens to) at least once a day. Sitting sucks. Standing sucks. Stairs suck. However, I occasionally get to poop, which is wonderful when it happens.

I have a doctor appointment tonight, and I’m crossing my fingers she’ll tell me to just go to the hospital right after. I’ll be her last appointment of the day, so it would be convenient for both of us. But I don’t think there’s been much change since last week, so I doubt it.. Did have contractions less than 5 minutes apart last Thursday, but only lasted about 45 minutes before they lightened up. It was a very disappointing night.

If anyone’s reading this, tell me your false labor stories, or any time you got your hopes up that labor was finally happening!

Week 37: Are We There Yet?

Baby Size: Honeydew Melon
Dilation: 3cm
Effacement: 60-70%

Well, big change from last week! Baby’s head is ‘very, very low’, according to my doc, so any day now, really. Hubby’s out of town this weekend, so I’m hoping baby waits until Sunday morning at least, so hubby’ll at least be on his way home by then. We have his daughter with us for the next couple weeks, so it’s pretty exciting that she will probably be here when baby comes.

Also exciting is the fact that hubby assembled the crib this past weekend! It looks great, although we probably won’t use it for a few months. We haven’t moved the moses basket into the bedroom yet, but that’s what we plan to use for the first few months. Now we just need to wash the cloth diapers and put those away (those will also not get used for a while yet, but they’re taking up room on top of the changing table currently).